Toronto Mike

Bad As It Seems: A Leaf Fan Laments


I was certain we hit bottom last October.  Hell, that was a good rant... here it is again in its entirety.

It's never been easy being a Leafs fan.  I discovered the team in the early 80s and endured some painful seasons when I was too young to expect any better.  One of my best early memories of the team was a first round sweep of the Chicago Black Hawks.  We were forced to make a lot out of very little.
Six and half years ago, I was using this blog to ask God "Why?".
What exactly do you have against my Toronto Maple Leafs? Why to you use your omnipotent power to crush us at every opportunity? You tortured us with the Harold Ballard regime, forcing me to grow up in a decade almost completely void of playoff victories. Then, when everything lined up perfectly for a Habs-Leafs Stanley Cup Final in '93, you gave The Great One yet another break and used your mighty power to blind the refs as Gretzky clearly high-sticked Gilmour. We deserved to win that night. You made sure it didn't happen.
I follow my Leafs today as closely as I ever did.  You could argue I follow them closer than ever, because I now follow their AHL affiliate quite closely.  I don't miss a game, I blog about every significant Leaf-related event and not a day goes by that I don't read about my team and think about my team.  It's never been particularly easy to be a Leafs fan, but I don't think it's ever been harder than it is right now.
My daughter is just about five and a half years old.  The Leafs haven't played a playoff game in her lifetime.  This is an unprecedented streak of failure for a team that hasn't won the Stanley Cup in 42 years.
When Brian Burke came on board, we were given something we haven't had in quite some time.  We had hope.  I'll never forget his quote following the 2008/2009 campaign. "We require, as a team, proper levels of pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence."  During the off-season, Burke made several moves to increase our levels of pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence.  During the pre-season, I'm sure we led the league in fights.  We were told that we may not win the Stanley Cup this season, but teams weren't going to look forward to playing us.
I'd argue that teams are looking forward to playing us.  It's the surest thing to a guaranteed two points there is in today's NHL.  In seven games, every team we've face has earned their two points, and most of them have done it rather easily.  We've been outscored 11-2 by opponents in first periods and the average score in our games has been 4.57 - 2.
We're 0-6-1, our goaltending has been brutal, our lack of offensive skill has been exposed and our abundance of tough defensemen have failed to gel.  There's talk of making our greatest prospect a healthy scratch, our coach is unfireable and we've traded away our next two first round picks.  Don't ya see!  In any other season, we'd get behind a "Let's Finish Last" campaign in the hopes we'd score our first first over all selection since Wendel Clark.  But in Leafs Nation, we don't figure out how to lose properly until it benefits a division rival.
I've been a massive fan for about 30 years, but now I'm stuck watching a terrible team with little hope.  With a healthy Monster and Phil Kessel, our best hope is that we actually win a handful of games, maybe make our Saturday nights a little brighter by being somewhat competitive.  After 30 years of investing blood, sweat and tears, I think I deserve better.  I think we deserve better.
Brian Burke, this is your team.  I don't believe pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence is enough.  We're going to need some skill.  We're going to need true leadership.  We're going to need real hope.
Fix this mess before we jump ship and raise our kids to be Penguins fans.

Then, just last January, I did it again.  That was another sweet rant, I'm pasting it down.

I thought I hit the bottom last October. I had just come to the realization that my five and a half year old daughter had not  been alive for a single Leafs playoff game.  We Leaf fans are enduring an unprecedented streak of failure for a team that hasn't won the Stanley Cup in 42 years.
Four months later, it's gotten worse.  For the first time since I discovered the team in the early 80s, I hate my Maple Leafs.  We've been this bad before, we've even been worse, but as a wise man once tweeted, the 2009-10 Toronto Maple Leafs "have no redeeming qualities whatsoever".
It's okay hating your favourite team.  I feel I've earned the right.  After 30 years of investing blood, sweat and tears, I know I deserve better.  And in lieu of better, I'm going to do what feels natural, and that means hating this hateful, brutal team.
I knew we found a new bottom when I got free tickets to next Tuesday nights game at the ACC and I didn't feel the excitement I've felt every time prior.  I'm not even looking forward to watching my team live and that scares saddens me.
The Passion That Afflicts Us All
It's bad, folks.  I hate my favourite team.  I can't stop watching them, or reading about them, or writing about them, but I sure as hell can hate them.  And I do.

I just finished watching the Leafs completely mail it in against the Edmonton Oilers. We were blown out 5-0, but more concerning than that, we didn't seem to care.  I don't remember this team quitting like that before, and if Ron Wilson isn't gone tomorrow, he's never going anywhere.

Again, we're 28th in the NHL, without a first round pick in the draft next June, without a bona-fide blue chip prospect in the organization and with absolutely no hope.

I watched the entire game, but it wasn't fun.  It was painful.  It was depressing.  It's as bad as it seems.

And it's only going to get worse.  Sigh.

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