Plus Roasting?

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Perhaps GLB can set-up a rotisserie spit and make like Swiss Chalet for the evening?!?
Oh, Mr. Shoalts was probably referring to the kind of roast involving Dean Martin (formerly!!)
and Jeff Ross!!!

September 12, 2018 @ 9:35 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


They don't call him Dave "The Hammer" Shoalts for nothing.

September 12, 2018 @ 9:43 AM


So, does that nickname mean that he also has a sideline career as old school hockey player or, better yet, a drop-kicking wrassler?!?

September 12, 2018 @ 9:46 AM


Only one man is THE HAMMER to me.

September 12, 2018 @ 10:51 AM


@bsmntdwllr73 - What would people pick on, for him? The Molly Johnson thing? Working out of his basement? Having more gray hair than the people 10 or 15 years older than him doing the roasting?

Dean Martin has been gone for more than 20 years, but Jeff Ross is appearing here in Toronto later this month as part of the comedy fest. I'm almost sure it was going to be at the Q.E. Theatre, but now it says Winter Garden. Maybe they've abandoned using anything at The Ex this year because of the lock-out, as it now appears nothing is scheduled there, including the Q.E. which they had been using every previous year, and one headline show that had for the first time definitely been set to use the Marlies' arena but now moved to the Leafs/Raptors one.

As a kid, I always thought those Dean Martin roasts were lame, but my late father inexplicably found Foster Brooks to be so hilarious I could hear him laughing from outside the house. The "act like a drunk" bit, from anyone, never made me laugh. I remember most of an episode of the 1970s Bob Newhart Show being like that, and thinking it was a wasted episode, but apparently others and Newhart himself somehow thought it was good.

September 12, 2018 @ 1:16 PM


You said you'd give me 5 minutes.

Please wear one of your 4 T-shirts from the pictures... ;)

September 12, 2018 @ 1:16 PM


Still not too late to hitchhike in from your neck of the woods with merely a satchel on your back and
that sad, lonely end theme music from the Incredible Hulk live-action TV series nipping at your
heels!! Definitely want that music eventually played at my sure-to-be sparsely unattended

September 12, 2018 @ 1:24 PM


Well, other than busting TM's chops for being a heck of a nice guy and a tremendous live event
host (and imaginary lips retreating from TM's digital behind in 5,4,3...!), you pretty much
summed up the sparse number of subjects available to roast him about. Oh yeah, and that infrequent, sort of speech impediment thing. But who am I to even remark about that, as I had a major issue pronouncing a lot of words myself back in my more innocent days (say, between the ages of 3 and 7!!) Guess you sorta had to be there to appreciate it, though,

September 12, 2018 @ 1:32 PM


- they could roast him about so much, but i find roasts to be not cool either. but i am sure they'll know what is appropriate/funny vs downright crude.

September 12, 2018 @ 1:44 PM


Perfect roasting solution: Impromptu corn roast!! Costco is nearby to provide the corn.

September 12, 2018 @ 1:47 PM


I roast Mike enough on the open Mikes.... ;)

Mine is not done Maliciously though.

September 12, 2018 @ 2:18 PM


I also thoroughly enjoy the roasting of the beef. Kinda half-watching my Shekels, so I haven't made
one for about four years or so. Coincidentally enough, most of my cooking experiments ceased to
exist with my mother's passing, as she was one who largely funded my Swedish Chef-influenced

September 12, 2018 @ 2:23 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

If I were roasting myself, I'd focus on:
- the high voice
- the white hair
- my inability to pronounce certain words
- my recent overuse of acronyms like TMDS and TMLX and TMI

September 12, 2018 @ 2:37 PM

Rick C in Oakville

Whats not to like about Mike, I also thought roasts were lame, but my dad is of the Dean Martin era and enjoyed every minute of them.
Are we getting name tags tonight?

September 12, 2018 @ 2:42 PM


New name-branding suggestion: T.A.M: Toronto Acronym Mike!! Perhaps you could get
a sweet sponsorship deal from a local manufacturer of Tam (o'Shanter) caps, if one actually
exists?!? Would make for a perfect parting gift for all those highly-esteemed and getting-on-in
years sports media guests!!!

September 12, 2018 @ 2:44 PM


Don Rickles was a roast god....

Mike I would not focus on the obvious, that's for rookies.

I would go for your other things like the accusations of you being a marginal tipper, and your penchant for shaving your chest and legs for "aerodynamics" while riding your bike.


September 12, 2018 @ 2:59 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

@Rick C in Oakville

Yes! LieveFamke is bringing name tags and markers so everyone can wear a name tag.

So find LieveFamke and Juan's table on the patio and help yourself!

I'll be there at 5:45pm.

September 12, 2018 @ 3:01 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


But my legs will be on full display and they're the ideal natural hairyness!

September 12, 2018 @ 3:38 PM


Your legs have been described as the platonic ideal of hairy legs in the past .

September 12, 2018 @ 4:00 PM

Rick C in Oakville

Another great night Mike, and the Royal Pains didn't disappoint again.
Shoaltz and Gare Joyce, have to give them 2 thumbs up for doing their stand up, it was a tough crowd!
Looking forward to the spring TMXL3!

September 12, 2018 @ 10:04 PM

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