Salt in the Wounds

Published by Toronto Mike on January 27, 2008 @ 15:39 in Family

I'm trying to come to grips with the fact I'll never be able to grow a full bushy beard. I can grow facial hair, but after a few days it just looks weak and begs me to shave it off. I've been trying to grow a solid goatee for over fifteen years and it ain't happening.

We recently had the family over for my son's birthday and my brother strolled in sporting a big bushy goatee. This would be like a woman being told she'll never be able to have children and another woman refusing to shut up about how easily she gets pregnant. It's rubbing salt in the wound.

As a guy who can't respectably advance beyond a 5 o'clock shadow, show me some respect and keep your wonderful beards away from me. Until the wound heals, at least.

More about my battle with the beard:

• Why I Won't Grow A Beard
• Quirks & Quarks
• Call Me Grey Beard
• Bad Beard Grower

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