Tonight, my dodgeball team plays for the championship of the world. Well, it's the TCSSC dodgeball championships, and that's sort of like the championship of the world.
We won the championship last season and tonight we go for the repeat. We'll be without our best female player because Jordy went down early in our slo-pitch game last night with a fractured wrist. She's in a cast for four weeks.
That slo-pitch series was super dramatic. I summarized it all in the comments of this entry. Our new rallying cry is "Win it for Jordy!"
We'll win it for Jordy tonight as well. It's time to grab life by the ball.
I spent yesterday evening at Berkeley Church on Queen Street East between Sherbourne and Parliament. I was there to witness two of my ball players exchange vows.
Raging Storm, the slo-pitch team I manage and play for, used to be called Hooray For Everything. I'm a founding member of this team that formed about eight or nine years ago, and one of the members of that inaugural squad was Jordy, a nice girl who was working at HMV at the time.
A season or two later, we added a young guy by the name of Mike Kic. Another season went by before I realized Jordy and Kic had coupled up. The two have been core members of the team ever since and even play on my dodgeball team.
I'm not a big fan of weddings. All the pomp and circumstance rubs me the wrong way. Last night, at the very cool Berkeley Church, I enjoyed a very cool wedding. The ceremony was short and very sweet, the speeches were heart felt and sincere and the vibe was comfy and joyous. It was my kind of wedding.
There are four female players on Raging Storm, and all four are going to get hitched in the next year. Kic and Jordy were first to bat and they hit a home run. Congrats, kids. Cito is proud of you.
I've been playing ball with Mike Kic for years. He's one of our three Mikes, and all three can lose their cool on the field now and then. When competitive people engage in a heated battle, fuses shorten and tempers flare. The challenge is to ensure the line is never crossed so you can stay in the game.
Kic is also on my dodgeball team. Last night, about half way through our tense match-up with Where's Linda?, Kic crossed the line. Already eliminated, he picked up the ball and drilled it at the guy who just knocked him out. It was then that Where's Linda? left the court and we were disqualified. We're awaiting judgment from the TCSSC as to our fate, but Kic has already launched a preemptive strike. He's quit.
Sorry about my stupid behaviour at tonight's game, that was ******* of me to do. I completely ruined the game for everyone and I apologize for my actions. I think it's best that I leave the competitive game of dodgeball so that this doesn't happen in future games for you guys.
Good luck the rest of the season, I know you guys will have more fun without my antics.
I hear you giggling at the "competitive game of dodgeball" line, but when you're out on that court, it's war. The beast within you is unleashed and you enter full combat mode. We trained Mike Kic to be a killing machine and then we chastised him for ignoring the boundaries.
Speaking of Mike Kic, he recently appeared in a Future Shop ad. Here he is going bananas about NBA07 on the PSP.
Over the winter I played dodgeball. It was my first dodgeball season and it was a great deal of fun. We actually ended up winning the championship.
Believe it or not, this is what a champion co-ed dodgeball team looks like. Scary, eh? I've signed up for another season and will play my first game Tuesday.
For the second time in less than eight months, I'm a champion. My slo-pitch team won our division last September and tonight my dodgeball team won the co-ed division.
Dodgeball is fun when you're losing, but it's hellishly fun when you're winning. We dominated tonight, and that's the best.
It's probably for the best that I've had my fill of winning, because my slo-pitch team is about to kick off a season in the comp division, the cream of the crop in the ever-expanding RSPA. I'm about to get a dose of humility, but for now I'm a champion once more.
"If you want to have dodgeball victory, you have to grab it by its haunches and you gotta hump it into submission!" ~ Patches O'Houlihan, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
Even though I missed a good chunk of the season with an injury, I returned last week to help lead my team to victory in the Toronto dodgeball league semifinals. Tonight, we play for championship.
"It's time to separate the wheat from the chaff, the men from the boys, the awkwardly feminine from the possibly Canadian." ~ Cotton McKnight, Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
It's show time.
After several weeks on the shelf, I made my return to dodgeball just in time for the semi-finals. We were facing the team that beat us in game one, a bunch of bearded dodgeball playing misfits who had a great regular season. The competition was fierce.
I played my best game to date, and it was super fun. Once you get in the groove, I don't think there's a more fun sport out there. It's 60 minutes of non stop dodging, catching and throwing, with a little trash talk sprinkled in for good measure.
We dominated. We're off to the finals next week. We could be the recreational dodgeball champions of Toronto.
If we prevail, you can etch that on my tombstone.
I got the call. The dodgeball team I played with earlier in the year before quitting on the advice of my doctor needs me. They're short a guy for their semi-final playoff game tonight.
This is not an April Fool's Day joke. I'll be on the floor tonight with the season on the line. It's time to dodge some balls.
I've been waiting for this moment all my life. I'm ready.
This afternoon, about two months after my right leg quit on me, I met with Dr. Grant Lum, MD, CCFP, Diploma in Sport Medicine. The dude acts as a consultant to the NHL Players' Association and he really seems to know his stuff. I told him my story, most of which you can read here, and performed his many tests.
The doc believes it's my sacroiliac joint. That's the joint between the sacrum, at the base of the spine, and the ilium of the pelvis, which are joined by ligaments, don'tcha know. It's either fractured or knocked out of whack and the result was a complete shut down of the posterior kinetic chain on my right side. Posterior kinetic chain isn't just fun to say, it's also a bunch of important muscles like the hamstring and glutes. With my posterior kinetic chain shut down, I simply don't have the strength to do what I'm used to doing, so after a 3k of running it hurts too much to continue.
He's got a six week treatment that should get me back running, but since he thinks I could have a fracture, he wants me to completely shut down for six weeks. No running, no long walks and no dodge ball. I had to convince him my one hour of skating with James each Saturday could be nothing more than a light walk-like glide to support my six year old. My treatment starts with a chiropractor as we get the alignment right again so my posterior kinetic chain works again.
I know how exciting this is for you all, so I'll post updates along the way. I can't believe my illustrious dodgeball career is over after a mere three games. I could have been somebody. I could have been a contender.
Tonight, I played my second game of dodgeball this season. We lost the first game last Tuesday but tonight we destroyed the competition. I thought I'd share my thoughts of the game of dodgeball now that I've had some seasoning.
First and foremost, dodgeball is hard on your throwing arm. By the end of the hour, your arm feels like it's going to fall off. Even lifting my arm to touch my right ear hurts. You're drilling the ball at the opposition with all your might but you can't let them catch it, so you just throw like a maniac. By the time my arm is feeling normal again, it will be time to mess it up again with game #3.
Dodgeball is far tougher than you'd think. There are four balls in play at all times and sometimes the opposition will have them all. That's when you're weaving and dodging and flipping and flopping to stay alive. With every game I got stronger as I got a feel for the timing and strategy, and now I'm loving it. It's a fantastic way to spend 60 minutes.
I just hate our team nickname. It's Duck Or I'll Hit You In The Face or something like that. I would have gone with something snappier. Just try yelling "Go Duck Or I'll Hit You In The Face Go!"
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