Tuesday Open Mike

Welcome to this week's Tuesday Open Mike. I'm Mike and I'll be your master of ceremonies for the day.

Feel free to use this space to vent, rant, share a story and/or ask a question of the hivemind.

Open Mike on Toronto Mike

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Al Reda

The ad tells me every Seinfeld ever is on Cravetv.

That's quite the get for Crave! I might even fork over $4/month for every Seinfeld on demand.

December 23, 2014 @ 8:59 AM


@Al Reda

I actually just clicked an ad for HBO on-demand.

It says:

"Now with your HBO Canada subscription, you'll get every past season and episode of current HBO series - at no extra charge."

Now I don't want to subscribe to HBO Canada, I just want to be able to stream every past season and episode of current (and old) HBO series.

Does this exist?

December 23, 2014 @ 9:09 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

There's a digital streaming app called Simpsons World that I've been looking it. You have access to every Simpsons episode ever, and there's almost 600, and a whole lot more.

But it's for the USA only, so you'd have the hassle of getting a US IP address for it to work.

This is the frustration with so many digital streaming services. Netflix has some stuff, but no HBO or shows like The Simpsons or Seinfeld. What if I want to stream the new HD release of The Wire but don't want to subscribe to HBO Canada via digital cable? What if I want The Simpsons but live here in Toronto?

December 23, 2014 @ 9:17 AM

Ryan G / hobogauntlet.blogspot.ca

Yesterday was one of those days that I intentionally took off from work so I could run all the errands that I constantly put off. You know, like getting a haircut, visiting my bank, hiding a body..that sort of thing.

First up, drop the car off at the dealership for it's regular maintenance. For $188, I got a lube, oil and filter. For that much money, they should have thrown in some heavy petting with that lube. Next, a joyful field trip to the dentist. I was really due for a cleaning since I've put off the last few appointments. Can you blame me? It's the fucking dentist.

A stock photo depicting a moment that has happened never.

In any event, aside from the pleasures of getting my gumline jabbed by a sharp non-musical instrument, a trip to the dentist is always fun due to the sheer trickery that goes on. It's like when James Bond meets a rival spy at a fancy cocktail party. They're civil and polite, but nobody's telling the truth. Like a lot of people I imagine, my dentist and I have this unwritten rule where we constantly lie to each other. He used to ask me if I'm flossing regularly. I'd say yes. He pretends to remember what I do for a living by looking on his computer fourteen seconds prior to coming into the room. But I'm ok with our deception. It's passive aggressive behaviour at it's finest. One time, one of his hygienists was busting my chops a bit much about the flossing thing, so I just said listen - if I and your other clients flossed as regularly as you'd like us to floss, you'd eventually go out of business. By letting my gums turn into the third act of a Friday The 13th movie, I'm sending your kids to college.

In reality, my gums are in decent shape since I use one of those water flosser thingamabobs. This results in significantly less gore when I go for my cleanings, and I don't walk out of there feeling like someone's fired a shotgun into my mouth.

From HoboGauntlet.blogspot.ca

December 23, 2014 @ 9:21 AM


Nice post. My dentist told me those water pic things are great - especially for people who don't like flossing. So it looks like THAT will be my Christmas present.

BTW, where is best place to hide a body?

December 23, 2014 @ 9:28 AM


Well, the Bengals won last night which makes me mad. That pushes my Ravens out of the playoffs even though they have one more game to play. The Raptors lost finally. They only lose once in a blue moon. My Coyotes lost though. That's no good. Well, my Nets, Suns, Habs and Coyotes will all win tonight.

December 23, 2014 @ 9:41 AM

Al The Royal Pain

Merry Christmas to everyone here. Happy Hanukkah and Happy Holidays! Be safe!

December 23, 2014 @ 9:44 AM

Lyle Lanley

Thanks for another great year - all of you!

Happy Holidays to all!

December 23, 2014 @ 9:45 AM

Ryan G / hobogauntlet.blogspot.ca


The Leslie Spit is always a good choice. The fact you can't even drive over there means the cops would have to ride their bikes, slowing things down while I got out of Dodge. Also, this past summer my wife and I rented one of those little powerboats and puttered through the channels around Centre Island. I mentioned to her that if I was ever going to kill her, I'd probably bring her to one of the little hidden lagoons. Of course, if she ever goes missing, I certainly hope this comment I'm writing isn't used as evidence. Ahh I'm not worried. Stuff on the internet never comes back to bite you in the ass...

Merry Christmas everyone - all the best in Twenty Fifteen.

December 23, 2014 @ 10:38 AM

James Edgar

Mike the US address thing is not all much hassle. And it's worth it if you use netflix. and it's not so much having a US IP address as having a US DNS address. We use Blockless it's costs about $5 a month but is totally worth it. not only does it give us access to Netflix US but about a dozen other countries as well. you do have to change the settings to get the other counties but it takes seconds.

BTW a netflix account you buy in canada works globally. Only one account required.

No HBO does suck as they have so many great shows but there's a crapload on the US and British channels and probably in Norway as well LOL

December 23, 2014 @ 10:50 AM


Breaking: Lawyers and Magnotta have returned to the courtroom. Verdict coming up?

December 23, 2014 @ 11:04 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


The longer the deliberations took, the more my gut tells me they'll find him NCR.

I've been in the room as foreman of a jury for a murder case where the accused pled NCR. We reached our verdict in less than 2 hours.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:07 AM


I'm betting a hung jury.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:08 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


Quite possible... if it's 11-1 and that one simply won't budge we're hung.

it's possible 11 came to one conclusion quickly and the last awkward week was dealing with that one juror...

December 23, 2014 @ 11:10 AM


Does anyone know whether the Crave /Shomi program choices are embedded with commercials? Do they include full screen credit rolls and are these episodes syndicated or offered at complete length? Are its 1990-2005 episodes recropped to widescreen dimensions or left within their original 4/3 formatted shapes for programs like Seinfeld?
Not that I care... I'm sold upon catching the innumerous and fantastic TV of the 1950s through early 1980s, plus movie stuff including cartoons and serials of the 1910s to 1960s, from all of the regional U.S. subchannels using a simple $15 indoor antenna.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:18 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


I got a free trial of Shomi from Rogers and tested it with an HD episode of 30 Rock.

It was the full episode with no ads. I don't remember if it was full screen credit rolls, but I think it was.

I can't imagine watching TV shows today with the regular ad breaks. I tolerate it with live sports, but that's about it.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:20 AM


@ Argie (9:28), and @Ryan G
The Spit may still have a few of the old subway station trash bins:

December 23, 2014 @ 11:25 AM


Original era(!) commercials are shown fairly often with channel 56.4, Throwback Television. They also tend to air some of the old b-movie films uninterrupted.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:31 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


I'm happy for you and whatever floats your boat, but your television preferences are likely shared by only 0.01% of the populous.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:33 AM


Did you receive any Christmas cards in the mail this year?

Did you send any?

Canada Post probably didn't help themselves when they doubled the price of a stamp in 2014 thus hastening the end of this holiday tradition.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:42 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


My wife received one card from a cousin in NY. I received zero via snail mail.

I did receive three e-cards.

I sent none.

December 23, 2014 @ 11:43 AM

Ryan G / hobogauntlet.blogspot.ca

Glen, TO Mike.
I imagine you will not even read this comment because I didn't write @Glen and @TO Mike right?

Interesting question though re xmas cards. My wife and I sent none. I think this outdated tradition will likely go the way of the Fords, to be completely replaced by more elaborate virtual greetings. Or, actual cards will become more popular because they'll be seen as rare - kinda like vinyl with hipsters.

Having said that, we received about 5 items in the mail from my wife's friends - photos of various children posing with various Santas at various malls. I haven't a clue who these children are, nor do I really care to be completely honest. Without getting into all the boring details - her group of friends have been in the same little clique since high school, and now as adults they try to outdo each other, in chronological order, with the most elaborate 1. Weddings 2. Houses 3. Children 4.Santa Photos 5. Divorces

Now the age old question is ...how long do they remain on my fridge door? For some silly reason it seems insensitive to chuck them directly into the trash, so they accumulate under a single magnetized calendar thingy on the fridge. When there are too many photos to be supported by the one magnet, they fall to the floor, which is God's way of telling me it's time for them to go.

December 23, 2014 @ 1:08 PM


Any and all cards I receive are read, enjoyed and recycled immediately.

December 23, 2014 @ 1:28 PM


Sitting along with Dad (in his 80s). TCM is showing 1967's "How to succeed in [cable] business without really trying". Oliver follows. Dad is dozing. With Shaw Direct's lineup it is this or else a four hour block of Airplane Repo repeats (Monday's choice), or listening to the women of The Talk discussing celebrity vaginas and/or The Social's hosts discussing their own vaginas.
My 0.01% TV lineup includes: Gunsmoke, multiple Lucille Ball sitcoms, The Little Rascals, Dick Van Dyke, Danny Thomas, Ozzie and Harriet, Dragnet, plus Adam-12, Emergency!, and CHiPs... BTW, MeTV has a new CHiPs promo featuring about five of its former actors. Cheers gets a "most interesting man in the world / stay 'funny' my friend" promo.

As to "Crave TV", Retro (ch. 56.2) airs Doctor Who episodes featuring all of of the earlier Doctor Who actors. And the animated Star Trek series made its temporary return about a year ago (MeTV). Crave claims to have ALL of the Star Trek series?

December 23, 2014 @ 2:19 PM


I'm impressed CQ (not sarcastic at all). I also have OTA and I've never seen any of those shows...I wouldn't even know how to find them!

December 23, 2014 @ 2:29 PM


What kind of winter boots does Strombo wear Mike?

December 23, 2014 @ 2:35 PM


Just buy an Apple TV & buy the shows you want to watch. The Apple TV has no hard drive so you just stream the show, or you can share them from a Mac computer (saves bandwidth). It's how I watched Sons of Anarchy rather than getting FX. You own the shows & can watch them on your own time.

It's unlikely that brand new television shows are going to be part of any streaming service. The shows are expensive & have to make a profit somehow. I'd sooner pay $32 bucks for a full season of 1080p viewing than stream them.

December 23, 2014 @ 2:47 PM

4x4 Time

I certainly hope everyone has the chance to spend some time with family and friends over the holidays to share some food, drink and laughs and wish everyone a happy and safe Holiday season.

Seasons Best to you and your families, and Merry Christmas to all who celebrate it.……

Peace, good health and prosperity to all in 2015.

December 23, 2014 @ 3:40 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

I thoroughly enjoy my Chromecast.

The kids love queuing up YouTube videos to play on the big screen. It's perfect for streaming via Netflix or anywhere else, really. Worth its weight in gold.

December 23, 2014 @ 3:57 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


Bootgate 2014 is over.

December 23, 2014 @ 3:58 PM

Rick C in Oakville

Great story Ryan, I am always on the end of the dental assistants lectures, even though I brush with an Oral B and floss regularly.
Had a great time at the Humble and Fred Christmas open house this morning, there really is a great group of regular people who contribute to the show, where were you this morning Mike?
Merry Christmas everyone, and a safe and happy New year

December 23, 2014 @ 6:28 PM

twins from bolton


Merry Christmas & Happy New Year. Leaving for a week to see my 1st Grandson in Ottawa Boxing Day.

Wifey came back yesterday from this weekend as I couldn't go due to work commitments.
4 Xmas babies now in our household - Dec. 2 (twins), Dec. 13 (grandson) & me Dec. 29.

Happy Holidays.

December 23, 2014 @ 6:53 PM


Our* beans have SO burned on the grill...
Just before lunch today, 'The Jeffersons' were on Dejaview. Just before dinner, the exact same episode of The Jeffersons was on Canada's only gov't licenced retro TV station, Dejaview. Now I know why even this sitcom itself had a replacement son /actor. The Toronto Star lists this subscription only cable station's programming as "Varied" upon their Star Week magazine's midday chart. The series itself continues through to 10 p.m for today.
An exact copy, twice during the same daytime; I didn't realize their repeats were this bad. Like Coors and Budweiser's Ontario beer store ownership, I guess former CanWest money lender Goldman Sachs is squeezing any monopoly profits they can get out of Shaw's TV division.

* I once interviewed for a junior scheduler role at Global's Toronto office back in their non Atlantis Alliance / CanWest days.

December 23, 2014 @ 7:43 PM


There is a $40,000-$45,000 cheque & wire payments processing accounting clerk role at TVO, here in Toronto. Damn I could sure use this one, and now! Damn, I could use a 25-30K clerk role, at that.

December 23, 2014 @ 8:43 PM

Blind Dave

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone. Be safe and happy!

December 23, 2014 @ 9:12 PM


Good Christmas Story: In a grocery store in a high income postal code, a frantic soccer Mom can't pay her bill because she has lost her Visa. A large thug like man (who normally shops elsewhere I might add) walks up in a leather vest with a Harley Davidson logo on one side and a hacker logo on the other. He says "is this your Visa?" The woman is relieved but looks at the guy with a look of disbelief.

Great Christmas Story: Christmas 2002. After buying some art I decided I need a cab to get home. I walk to the local major grocery chain (Kensington in Calgary, AB) and start trying to get a cab. It's Friday. I notice a Santa Claus outside the store being..Santa. Knowing I have a 90 minute wait for a cab I decide I'll sit on the bench and covertly sneak drinks of the alcohol I have.

Within a few minutes I notice Mr Santa is smoking cigarettes which are not professionally produced. They're rolled at home. I also take note Mr Santa has no round cash thing for donations. I figure it must be in the store. Time passes & I notice that when there are no people walking by Mr Santa is indulging in strong liquor from his sack. I also notice that this Santa pays attention ONLY to young modern women walking in the store. Santa wants a Christmas hug. It's then I realize this motherfucker is some old man who isn't a real Santa, he's just dressed up as one hoping to get hugs from woman walking by. What amazes me most is that this is right in front of said grocery store.

Same store. Both times. Merry Christmas.

December 23, 2014 @ 9:12 PM

this guest

Merry Christmas
to all!

@speysidephil: I am enjoying the Kingston Trio christmas folk music
you suggested.
Have you seen this raucous Dylan 'Must Be Santa' video?
I would have liked to be at that (fake) party:

All best to all!

December 23, 2014 @ 9:59 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

Who wants to hear me play 10 of my favourite Christmas songs and tell a story about each one? http://www.torontomike.com/christmas/

December 23, 2014 @ 11:57 PM


@this guest
Dylan never ceases to amaze me. I have a feeling that party may have gone on after the shoot. Lol.
Merry Christmas to you and all members of TM.

December 24, 2014 @ 8:32 AM


I could probably cut my grass today.

Merry Christmas.

December 24, 2014 @ 8:37 AM


Better yet, you could probably play golf today.

December 24, 2014 @ 9:05 AM



In Coastal BC you can mow your yard all year. I remember the first time I came here in the winter. I'd driven from Calgary and it was bitter cold. I was getting gas and the guy at the station was cutting the lawn. Only real issue is the monster rains sometiems. Last week it rained like 200 mm just north of Van.

December 24, 2014 @ 9:26 AM



Irv, my son has lived in BC for the last 20 years or so . He says it gets very depressing sometimes, but once the Sun shines and you see the Mountains, all is forgotten.

December 24, 2014 @ 9:35 AM


Well, Happy Holidays everyone. I couldn't have asked for a better night in sports. My Habs won. My Coyotes won. My Nets and my Suns won. The only bad thing that happened was the Leafs won. Anyway, turns out there is still a slight chance the Ravens could make the playoffs. San Diego has to lose and the Ravens have to win to get in. I hope it can happen. Well, my Cardinals will be there. They will win their last game over the 49ers. I won the pool, but the leader told me to just sit tight. I will get my money when I get it.

December 24, 2014 @ 11:32 AM

Jason from Sudbury

Merry Christmas everybody!

December 24, 2014 @ 11:44 AM


Merry Christmas everyone!

December 24, 2014 @ 12:11 PM



I like the rain to be honest. It does lead to a heavy feeling sometimes though. I think the rain in Vancouver is part of the reason the city has such a turbulent past. When I walk in the Downtown East Side, you can feel the energy (all of it negative). One thing that just wore me out in Calgary was the forever sunshine all summer.

If you all missed it, last weekend Marsden was on CFNY. It's apparently been podcast on spiritofradio.ca. I haven't looked for it, but I did listen.

December 24, 2014 @ 3:32 PM


To All:

A lot of us regulars on this site are part of a family & we should be thankful to Toronto Mike for giving us this opportunity to comment & read this blog. We all have our opinions & write them & that is great regardless if we agree or disagree. This is probably only my 2nd time commenting in the last 2 weeks as I stopped because alot of people were challenging another persons character with comments that were made. Lately comments have been not like this with name calling & constant "bitching" between 2 or 3 people every other comment.

Merry Christmas to all & especially you Toronto Mike & your family - Santa hopefully comes for Jarvis this year & comes for my 1st Grandson born 12/13/14 in Ottawa.

@ Cheryl - Santa is NOT coming to your house tonight because you DON'T beleive. Keep your door & chimney closed.

December 24, 2014 @ 4:41 PM



At the Toronto Mike open house, I served some "BC brownies" hence the calm. I'm the Martha Stewart of Canada.

December 24, 2014 @ 6:20 PM


The influence of CFNY Toronto is huge. And Mike's fav Christmas song is an example. You can hear this all across the country on a multitude of stations. And everyone knows it.

December 24, 2014 @ 7:37 PM


My Wife's Uncle has a birthday today & he is younger than my wife by 6 months.

I have the answer - but does anyone else?

December 24, 2014 @ 10:15 PM

this guest

I passed a woman on the street today talking loudly into one of those 'ear device' cell phones:
'Well, you're the one who left us.'

December 24, 2014 @ 10:24 PM


@this guest
Sad! Maybe it will work out for whoever it was.

Don't confuse me on Christmas Eve. Lol
Good to have you back!

December 24, 2014 @ 10:44 PM

Rick C in Oakville

@dale. I had a coworker younger than her neice's and nephews. Her mom was pregnant at 17, and her mom got accidentally pregnant again in her early 40's.

December 25, 2014 @ 7:07 AM

this guest


yes, I got the feeling she had done her fall down and rebound and he (assuming it was a he)
was the one quite adrift.

@ Rick C & Dale

Then there is that classic old country song 'I"m my own Grandpa' by Ray Stevens.
One version online even has a 'diagram.' Hilarious.

December 25, 2014 @ 7:31 AM


Boring last night with no sports whatsoever and tonight is the same. Tomorrow I have a game at 1:00. My Nets hopefully will win. Maybe I'll be sorry I dropped out of the basketball pool. Oh well, it was the right thing to do. A couple others dropped as well, one guy with the Cavs and Spurs dropped out. Anyway, I don't have a chimney. I live in a condo apartment. There is no Santa anyway.

December 25, 2014 @ 10:59 AM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike


I think you're taking this too literally.

Of course, there is no Santa. He's fiction. I think Dale is talking about what he symbolizes to those who believe. I think...

I'm with you about the lack of sports, I was looking for a game last night, too. There are a few good NBA games today, but tonight we have Canada playing in the Junior Championship and I'm looking forward to that.

December 25, 2014 @ 11:22 AM

Jason from Sudbury

@Toronto Mike: I thought the Junior Championship only started tomorrow?

December 25, 2014 @ 2:52 PM


If you have an XBOX or Sony Playstation, they are #TangoDown thanks to the "Lizard Squad".

December 25, 2014 @ 7:46 PM


Santa came to my house last night & left goodies for all of us.
Yes Mike, it is symbolizing with my nieces who believe & will I be doing it for many more years with my grandson.

December 25, 2014 @ 10:13 PM

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