2010 Santa Claus Parade (Snark Version)

SantaI just wrote the sweet as all hell recap of the 2010 Santa Claus Parade. That's the one you can show your kids or little nephews and nieces or cousins. This is the snark version.

I'd like to know how much DreamWorks had to pony up for the massive Shrek DVD push that opened the parade. In addition to Shrek himself, every kid at the parade got a little gift pack complete with Shrek ears. There were more Shrek ears than reindeer antlers and Santa hats combined.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Hey, celebrity clowns. I don't mean to look a gift horse in the mouth and all, but where was the chocolate? It was all candy, no chocolate, and I friggin' love those holiday eggs you've handed out in previous years. Couldn't you have taken some of that DreamWorks money and scored some chocolate?

2010 Santa Claus Parade

The first real float was called "Rob Ford" and it passed without any fanfare. It was surreal, really.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Poor Blinky... he doesn't even blink anymore. First he stops driving himself, then he stops talking, but now that he's not blinking, is he really Blinky anymore?

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Nothing says Christmas like Lady Gaga!

So very, very creepy.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

These guys just stink.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Really, Ken? A pink tie?

2010 Santa Claus Parade

I don't know what these things are, but I hate them.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

These guys might be creepier than the upside down clowns.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

I for one am sickened by the continuous and overt sexualization of animals in this parade.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

A notorious criminal celebrated in front of our precious children? Disgusting.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Blowing through walls just got a little easier.

2010 Santa Claus Parade

Somebody has an ego!

2010 Santa Claus Parade


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Comments (5 - click here to join in!)

Ajax Mike

"I don't know what these things are, but I hate them."

They're the main characters from Little Big Planet on PS3.

November 21, 2010 @ 10:30 PM

Toronto Mike Verified as the defacto Toronto Mike

PS3... the console I don't own!

November 21, 2010 @ 10:33 PM

NMB Ryan

I'll add my own snark.

I don't like parades.

And i don't like it when said parades intrude on my getting about the downtown core (same with marathons,etc).

Yesterday i stopped in at my fave pub Betty's and a few of the guys who dress up as clowns showed up. They were carrying their costumes, but they chose not to take off their makeup, i'm guessing in an attempt to get some attention.

It didn't work. They just looked like nerds. Maybe they should have tried Boston Pizza in the 'burbs.

November 22, 2010 @ 11:38 AM

Rick C in Oakville

Oh the memories, haven't been in about 5 years as the kids are too old. We use to do University ave also so that if the kids leaky bladders (and mine) after 15 cups of Hot Chocolate had to be relieved, we could zip over to Village by the Grange and use their facilities. Washrooms always seemed to be the toughest things to find.
We did Front by the Humming bird Centre, Yonge but they were too crowded and prone to the late arrivers pushing little Billy and Billet to the front, then act indignant when you said what gives? Always got the lame "It's for the kids" BS, so why not show up 2-3 hours ahead like me and stake out your spot?

Still the best Santa Claus parade to this day.

Thanks for the photos Mike.

November 22, 2010 @ 8:04 PM

Phil

I love this parade.. I never miss it!

November 22, 2010 @ 11:24 PM

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